my father left me & my mother when i was 19. in 2025, it had been 6 years since i last spoke to him.
as time passed, i began forgetting what he looked like, how he talked, and how he behaved. often, i would stumble upon old media that showed me close to him, but fail to recall those memories. on one hand, that was good — i was starting to let go. on the other, parts of me desperately wished for us to meet; so that i could preserve these memories in their original form.
me, my father & our neurons invited strangers to influence my dilemma. physical-units made with clay represented neurons in either my brain or my father's, depending on where a person placed it. each neuron accessed a different memory.
by moving neurons around, people could see the same memory in my brain (where i'm beginning to forget him) or his (where he's probably starting to forget me).
if two neurons with the same memory were found in both our brains, the program made a 'link' between them. if the two neurons were left far apart, the person decided that we should fade out of each other's lives. if they were placed close together, the person was suggesting that we should meet & preserve our memories.
every 3-minutes, i took a snapshot of all the links, and calculated a score based on their distance that suggested whether i should let go (linked-neurons placed apart from each other) or reach out (linked-neurons placed close to each other).
the itp-winter-show audience accessed 5723 memories, and decided that i should let go.
the making is extensively documented here.
this project was exhibited at the itp-winter-show-2025, and porter-novelli's-innovation-salon in 2026.
aidan nelson for allowing me to deviate from the expected outcomes in his course; mimi yin for the programming help; the fall-2025 hypercinema class & attendees of the winter-show for their kind, human & vulnerable reactions; shloka mohanty for helping me record the initial demo; dan-o & marlon for the winter-show support; the doc-lab at itp; and my mother for allowing me the space to process my loss the way i need to.