felt like propranolol lately. calmed myself down.
i look at the long list of things i want to make. it is evident that i can’t make all of them this week. i shouldn’t too — i ought to rest, prepare, think, eat, move, clean.
i prioritize, but it is still overwhelming.
so i remind myself of smaller time-windows. think about the next half semester — what do you want to leave with? i need atleast a couple of good projects.
then comes the summer. i have the summer figured out — i don’t need to look for work now. i am in good standing for the shop & the recurse center — i can look at the summer as yet another semester.
then i focus on thesis.
then i focus on the residency. attempt to publish.
then the ph.d.
and then we figure out what to do next.
the path is clearer than when i first came here. i think i’ve adjusted to the normalized passage of time here — 7 weeks on, 1 week off, 7 weeks on, 4 weeks off.
when you go, you go. when you rest, you rest. ==rest is not just rest — it’s the time to reflect, to read, to converge, to re-plan, to prepare, to digest.==
just keep going further with your curiosity — don't let the pressure get to you. you have two more years; look at how far you've come, a.
you're only going to go further.